Story Time...

Once upon a time...

there were three people....

who got to this country by...

making it big in Japan...

by starting a nuclear power plant...

that lead to...

Sexual favors and....

radio-active semen which....

impregnated the bellies of...

Tony lee

The three boys used Tony Lee's pregnancy...

To create a bonas hating, pro-Canisius gang whom.....

died in the least tragic fire of all times.

The radioactive semen protected the unborn children inside Tony Lee's womb from the fire....

that sean o'shea's singing was spreading

http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/06/08/2-people-die-as-bear-flies-through-suv/?hpt=hp_p1&iref=NS1

Hey, it's a story

that's the way I always dreamed I'd die, by a hurtling bear.... Lucky Bastards

Really? I've always dreamed that a cave would collapse on top of me knocking me unconscious and leaving me to be frozen in a sheet of ice, only to be uncovered thousands of years later to take part in all kinds of futuristic shenanigans.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_thelookout/20110615/ts_yblog_thelookout/far-out-magic-mushrooms-could-have-medical-benefits-researchers-say

Meh, I think three on this board would disagree.."94 percent of participants rated it as one of the top five most spiritually significant experiences of their lifetimes."

I would say it would be in top five most confusing moments of my life.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chibrknews-offduty-cop-dressed-as-a-clown-shoots-kills-teen-20110617,0,2536287.story?obref=obinsite

He gone

Cali wrote:http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/chibrknews-offduty-cop-dressed-as-a-clown-shoots-kills-teen-20110617,0,2536287.story?obref=obinsite

He gone

and by teen, yes they meant black teen.

http://old.news.yahoo.com/s/dailycaller/20110626/pl_dailycaller/wronglypronounceddeadwomandiesofshockatownfuneral

Nothing cool happens in America anymore and I totally ruined the intended purpose of this thread......for the better

Postscript-That would rule Panda

P.P.S http://www.chicagotribune.com/health/sns-rt-us-hendersontre75o1nu-20110625,0,2739884.story?obref=obnetwork

If you're board I'd read the second one^^^

http://www.cnn.com/2011/CRIME/06/30/massachusetts.pool.woman.body/index.html?iref=NS1

This story rules and really shows the incompetency of workers in the public sector.

if only pat was blogging we'd have an inside scoop!!

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2011/07/south-california-proposed-as-51st-state-by-republican-supervisor.html

Apparently, a member of the Riverside County Board of Supervisors in California is proposing that the conservative counties in California break away and form South California.

The last line in the article killed me. Spokesman for Governor Jerry Brown says, "If you want to live in a Republican state with very conservative right-wing laws, then there's a place called Arizona."

50+ electoral college votes is too many anyway split em up. fuck it.

Ya we should definitely mix up the good old 50, bring in some new Talent and combine some meaningless states to cut back numbers. We need to ask some serious questions like; do we Really need two Dakotas? Can't Massachusetts and Connecticut Just Split up Rhode Island? Aren't Vermont and New Hampshire basically the same state? Ditto with Arizona and New Mexico? Should we let Texans succeed and let the Mexican Army battle regular Texans and see who gets the state fair and square?

I mean consolidation means we could add some up and coming stars like Puerto Rico which isn't a state because clearly a 51 star flag would look retarded and thoroughly Un-Amurican...
Shit we could even invade Cuba or something, think of the beaches! beach front property will be the 'New Oil' soon when the Dubai Islands finish sinking even before construction finishes...



^ See!?! 51 stars just looks ridiculous!


And the Electoral College may sound like a lame school to go to with slightly older elitist classmates and a knack for fucking over the Popular Voice of the American people every once in a while for shits and giggles (1876, Hayes; 1888, B. Harrison; and.... shit I forgot the other one... o well)



But they know which parties to take our country to (While recently they have favored the Democratic and Republican Parties depending on the night the Whig party still holds the record for 'Best Jungle Juice')

and I mean they have like 50 kick ass frats and some pretty fucking hard partiers, animals even...



Anyways Alls I'm sayin is we need to get Puerto Rico so we can party Hardy with the Electoral College on Spring Break and not worry about feeling guilty about some poor ass Rican kids kicking a deflated soccer ball in the dirt streets while we throw a toga party...

Planking is so last year. Lets invent something that is harder and more dangerous.

http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2011/09/08/batmanning-replacing-planking-as-new-internet-trend/

http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/26/living/halloween-ethnic-costumes/index.html?hpt=hp_c2

Ok, I may think this is funny because I'm very sleep deprived and it's 8:30, but the kid holding the magazine that says, "This is who I am" and the picture is of a terrorist with a bomb strapped to his chest is too funny. If you don't find it funny at least you have last minute costume ideas.

I thought they werent allowed to have images of the prophet

Oh. My. God. I absolutely destroyed the ATG bathroom. Like when you picked me up from the bowling alley to meet that ND girl bad, maybe worse. One person even gagged. or ....You decide

Sorry, political article, but it's pretty funny.

http://www.unionleader.com/article/20111229/OPINION01/712299993

I don;t understand why you think that is funny. Fear mongering idiots, who forget the fact that ron paul has recieved the most money from members of the armed service, depress the hell out of me.

Ron Paul 2012

Just read this gem on CNN. It was a comment on Ron Paul…

"And just think...under President Wrong Paul, heroin will be legal!
Anybody but Wrong Paul 2012."

Holy fuck, this woman can not be serious. I’m not necessarily for Ron Paul, but this fear mongering technique pretty funny. Yes, he gets elected and all of a sudden, Poof! Heroin is legal and sold over the counter at CVS.

Panda, how does Pittsburgh feel about their hometown boy? Ron Paul is the new Obama.

great story.

http://gma.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/cdc-millions-americans-binge-drinkers-173229438--abc-news.html

Happy to be part of a statistic.

http://www.burlingtonfreepress.com/article/20120116/NEWS02/120116019/Group-protests-MLK-Day-opening-TD-Bank-?odyssey=tab|topnews|text|FRONTPAGE

I hope this catches on. I hate working on MLK day. I should at least get time and half

"I have a dream that one day a white man might once again profit from the black man by getting time and half on mlk day..."- or something like that

DeLaNoche wrote:

From this article the woman says, " Can you imagine not being able to go down MLK Boulevard?". That wasn't a joke. I don't know about other cities, but MLK Boulevard in Chicago is in a pretty unsafe neighborhood and the last thing I would want to do is go for a walk on that street at night.

Anyway, here is a discriminatory app based on factual statistics.

http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2012/01/17/app-that-would-guide-users-away-from-high-crime-areas-proves-controversial/

Cali wrote:

DeLaNoche wrote:

From this article the woman says, " Can you imagine not being able to go down MLK Boulevard?". That wasn't a joke. I don't know about other cities, but MLK Boulevard in Chicago is in a pretty unsafe neighborhood and the last thing I would want to do is go for a walk on that street at night.

Anyway, here is a discriminatory app based on factual statistics.

http://dfw.cbslocal.com/2012/01/17/app-that-would-guide-users-away-from-high-crime-areas-proves-controversial/

Just make sure you stay the fuck away from the intersection of MLK Blvd. and Malcolm X Way. Worst intersection in every god damn city.

I was on the bus this morning sitting next to a dude with his weird looking girlfriend and a crazy looking, possibly homeless black guy sitting across from us. The odd couple gets up to get off the bus and the crazy black guy looks the dude right in the eye and says, "You got any scooby snacks fo yo girl?" And then he starts laughing hysterically which made me start laughing hysterically. It made it really awkward because I was getting off at the same stop.